12 Ways to Create a Happy Relationship
Marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs, but it can be one of the most fulfilling experiences in your life. A happy marriage is not something that happens by accident, but it requires intentional effort from both partners. If you have been looking for the secrets of a happy relationship, here are a dozen ways to help you to create a happy relationship:
Communication:
Communication is the foundation of any relationship. It is important to communicate effectively and openly with your partner. Talk about your thoughts, feelings, needs, and listen to your partner without judgment or defensiveness. Spend time to check and see if your partner feels heard, if what you hear them saying is the message that they intended you to hear.
2. Quality time:
Make time for each other and prioritize your relationship. Schedule date nights or weekend getaways, and find activities that you both enjoy. Sharing pleasurable activities is a way to build connections and helps to make your partner be your favorite person to hang out with.
3. Respect:
Respect each other's opinions, beliefs, and boundaries. Avoid belittling or criticizing your partner, and show appreciation for their contributions to the relationship. There will be times you don’t agree (and that is ok) but still create space for each other’s differing opinions and work towards understanding each other's point of view. You can have differing views and still be respectful of one another.
4. Forgiveness:
No one is perfect, and mistakes will happen. Learn to forgive each other and move forward, rather than dwelling on past mistakes or holding grudges. Don’t repeatedly throw past mistakes up to your partner when you are fighting, this will further distance you and may make your partner feel like nothing they do will be good enough. When someone feels like they will never be good enough they often stop trying which only builds more conflict. So forgive quickly and whenever it is needed, don’t keep recalling the list of things they’ve done wrong.
5. Trust:
Trust is essential in any relationship. Be honest and reliable, and avoid betraying your partner’s trust. If trust is broken, work together to rebuild it.
6. Shared goals:
Set shared goals and work towards them together. This can be anything from planning a vacation to saving for a down payment on a house. Having shared goals will bring you closer and give you something to work towards together. Check in with each other as you are working towards the goal and make adjustments as needed. Create space to value each persons idea and method to getting closer to the goal and then decide together how to tackle it.
7. Intimacy:
Intimacy is not just about physical touch, but also emotional connection. Make time for physical intimacy, and also focus on emotional intimacy by sharing your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with each other. Create a safe space to be vulnerable with each other. Emotional intimacy can also improve your physical intimacy, make time for each other every day or as often as possible.
8. Compromise:
No two people will agree on everything, but it is important to find a solution. Work together to see if a middle ground can be reached, be willing to try something on a trial basis to see if it will work for both of you. If the trial period ends and it hasn’t been successful try something else for another trial period.
9. Laughter:
Laughter is the best medicine, and it can also bring couples closer together. Find ways to make each other laugh, whether it's watching a funny movie or sharing silly stories.
10. Gratitude:
Show gratitude for your partner and the things they do for you. Express appreciation for the little things, and don't take each other for granted. Frequent expression of gratitude helps to encourage more of the behavior(s) that you appreciate. We all need to feel valued and appreciated especially from our partners.
11. Patience:
Patience is a virtue, and it is essential in a happy relationship. Be patient with each other's faults and shortcomings, and give each other the space and time to grow and change.
12. Support:
Support each other through thick and thin. Be there for each other in times of need, and celebrate each other's successes. This creates shared experiences and builds trust and depth in your relationship.
A happy relationship is not about finding the perfect partner, but about working with the partner you have to create a fulfilling relationship. By practicing these twelve habits, you can build a strong and lasting relationship that will bring happiness and joy to both partners. If you are currently struggling in your relationship and need some support from a professional I may be able to help. I currently offer online couples counseling to couples in Florida and California and you can book a free consultation at www.onlinecouplecounseling.com
Joann Ikeh, LMFT
www.onlinecouplecounseling.com
